I love summer. Hot sand stuck to my skin, the first twinkle of fireflies at night, strolling for a late sunset. The last day of school blows in and rearranges the usual rules and schedules and priorities into vacation travel and reunions with family and friends. Especially with this expat life that we have chosen, summer truly is a break from the norm.  

On demand feeding is the antithesis of this sort of shift. If you are allowed ice cream all the time, then ice cream in the summer is no longer a treat or a big deal. At least in theory. 

But when this kind of cycle in embedded in your life, the food seems to follow along. Like many expats, we return to the US and our eyes bulge at the volume of options in the grocery store. It is hard not to give in to everything from almond butter to mocha chip ice cream, because it really is hard to find these things in Beirut. 

What is a treat? Is there a difference between the treat that you cannot have because you do not have access to it, and the treat that you are not allowed to have?

In my experience, that fear of scarcity can be triggered either way. So I watch as we all indulge and wonder how much is ok and how much is too much. Then sometimes I get scared and I want to control, restrict, manage, coerce.

Feed not fight. Breathe.

I pull the daughter aside who is milling around the kitchen and ask, 

Hot or Cold?

Salty or Sweet?

Crunchy or Smooth?

(for more information on using these questions for on demand feeding read this post)

It is easy to forget how much practice it takes to move from outside to inside, from summer winds to inner still.