Melissa Macomber | What to do When a Parent is Cheating?

View Original

IN PLAIN ENGLISH: Parental Infidelity and Children’s Reactions: A Case Study in a Filipino Family 

WHICH QUESTIONS DID THEY ASK?

This study identifies that previous studies have either focused on adult children who were often recalling parental infidelity OR a parent’s perception of their child’s reaction to infidelity. It seeks to have first hand knowledge from children.

WHO DID THEY ASK?

Three children ages 16, 14 and 12 who had discovered their mother’s affair 2 years before

WHERE WAS THE STUDY CONDUCTED?

California, USA

WHEN?

Published in 2020

WHY?

The article begins with the assertion (from previous research) that children are greatly affected by parental infidelity, and yet there is no research a child’s experience when they are a child. All research has been from the perspective of an adult looking back.

WHAT WAS LEARNED?

Children felt negative emotions towards their parents and themselves including:

  • Confusion about right and wrong

  • Loss of trust in both parents

  • Confusion about who to side with

  • Emotions leading to poor academic performance

  • Negative perceptions of marriage

Amidst all of the pain, each of the kids also expressed hope, for themselves and for their future relationships.

THE TAKEAWAY IN ONE SENTENCE…IS THE SAME FOR EVERYONE

The silver lining to this article is that each of the children expressed hope for the future, which can be used to facilitate healing. 

Reference:

Batara, J.B., Guanzon, A.B., Macaloyos, J.L., Diaz, C.L., Albao, J.C., & Villano, M.D. (2018). Parental Infidelity and Children’s Reactions: A Case Study in a Filipino Family. PRism, 23.